My life is insanity..but nothing has changed.

I always say I'm going to write more every time I make a post. I'm not even going to lie anymore. i want to post more, but I don"t know what the future holds for me.

Anyway lets get into it. I seriously was going to post an update 2 weeks ago but my Blackberry was not having it. I just had this random though the other day after looking on my facebook. My old bestie was talking about how she was going to sacrifice her dream to so she could better provide for her children. Which is totally understandable. I was just wondering though is it better to sacrifice your dream for a financially stable life that makes you miserable. On the other hand wouldn't a parent want their children to pursue their dreams no matter what as opposed to giving them up. I truly believe if you follow your dreams the money will come to you as opposed to you chasing money. Just wondering.

On the other hand let me get back to my life. So for a year I have been saving up money so I could move to California. I've also been looking for jobs and applying like crazy. Unfortunately I have yet to find anything. I have been quite discouraged about that. I have been trying so hard and nothing is happened. Then I start to think maybe I should stay here, but everything here is pushing me a way. I decided to stop looking for work about 2 months ago and take a break to figure out what I really need to do. Between work and family driving me crazy all I really want to do is leave as soon as possible. I see so many people who have given up on their dreams here and I don't want to be like that. Just existing not truly living and enjoying life. I hope to be an inspiration to people in my family to wake up and live life. Whether you believe in reincarnation or not this will be the only time in this specific life that we have to get it right. So I am trying my best to keep my self afloat because I can't waste my life regretting that I didn't live my life the way I want to.

Anyway that is it for now. As always peace, love, and blessings!

Obsessed!

Okay I didn't write in the time frame I said i would, but I'm trying. I've been trying to keep myself occupied and just seemed to have failed at time management. I mean don't get me wrong I get to work on time. I get there so early i usually make coffee and have time to fix myself a bowl of oatmeal. Which oatmeal leads me to the title of this post. I've been compiling just a few things I've become obsessed with lately.

1. Coffee Ice Cream

I first had this in 6'th grade at my best friend's house at the time. It was so good. I didn't particularly care for coffee at the time either. Now I love coffee. I don't allow myself to drink it much because it can be habit forming. So this is how I get my fix on off days. Even though I did eat this twice last week before bed and had no problem sleeping. I think they may use decaffinated coffee. Plus if you like Frappe's this is a way cheaper alternative. You get like 10 times the serving and it basically tastes the same to me.

2. Doritos Flamas

I had been seeing these at the store but never picked up a bag to try until about 2 weeks ago from Walgreens. The lime was really the only reason I got them. I'm not really crazy about hot chips. They are good but they don't make me jump for joy. So yeah these bad boys are hot. They are so good though I couldn't just eat one. First the heat gets you and at the end you taste the hint of lime. They are soooo good!!!

3. The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo
By: Stieg Larsson

I know this book is extremely popular right now. I hate to say that I fell into the hype and hopped on the bandwagon. I originally started reading this book about 3 or 4 months ago. I originally purchased the digital copy for my reader, but since no electronics are allowed on the floor at my job I had to get a physical book as well. So I read a few chapters and finally gave up. It's a really good book but totally different from what I usually read. Then I went to the movies to see X-Men First class and I saw the movie trailer. For some reason it got me pumped up to read the book again. So everyday I try to squeeze in a few pages. It's worth all the hype you just have to keep reading!

4. The Little Things(They Are Actually Huge If You Pay Attention)

Life will pass you by if you don't pay attention. I don't remember where I got that from but it is so true. Life is full of beautiful things. Some times we just have to stop and marvel at all the amazing things God has put on this earth. It is so easy to get caught up in things that are superficial. I've been trying my best to thank God for all he has created by actually acknowledging it. These are just a few pictures that my camera phone did no justice in capturing their beauty. Lately the sky here has been so beautiful. Just a few days ago there was a beautiful red moon in the sky. I just had to marvel at it's beauty. My phone felt it was the perfect time to shut off and refused to take a picture though.

So that is what I'm obsessed with now. Pretty soon I will be obsessed with the new season of True Blood that starts in a few hours. So let me get some reading in before it gets to late! As always peace, love, and blessings!!!

I am back! For real this time!

There is no point excusing my absence. I have had much on my mind and though it is better to express those things I held them inside.Now I'm in a better mind space and ready to let it all out. I have been trying to focus on my songwriting but life has gotten in the way and I haven't been able to allow myself the time to dedicate to writing. I'm always trying to make myself a better person. So during this time that I've been away I have been trying to work on myself spiritually. So I will explain what I've been doing since I obviously haven't been writing.

As it says it's a course in not only discovering your creativity but also helps recovering your creativity. I originally heard about the "morning pages" on a video I saw on YouTube. So after hearing about the pages I started doing them. Then the next week I decided to get the book to see what other ideas were in it to help my creativity. This book is amazing. This is a 12 week course and I stopped at week 9, because I just had so many thing going on. Even though I have temporarily taken a break from the course I still do my morning pages and I intend on starting the course again eventually. The author Julia Cameron also has 2 more books that go along with this course as well. I will definitely be getting those when I finish the book. For more books I've been reading you can check out my profile for Good Reads in the the links on the right side of the blog.---->

So next is what I've been doing with my hair since that was the original purpose of the blog. I haven't done anything special to be honest. At first I did a wash and go everyday. Now I am way to lazy to wash my hair everyday. My hair has grown a lot despite my profile picture I have cut my hair twice. I'm going to hold off on doing that for now. I have crazy shrinkage so my hair shrinks up and looks 20x shorter then it actually is. All I've been doing lately are twist outs. I was supposed to twist my hair today, I don't feel like it so i may actually do a wash and go tomorrow. Hopefully I get to leave work early tomorrow and twist it then. The thing I love about twists outs are I only have to do my hair once a week. That way when I get up in the morning all I have to do is maybe wet my hair and shake it and go. I have tried the oh so famous Kinky Curly.

I've tried everything except the Gloss Pomade. I like the products. The only problems I have is for my hair it is time consuming. Not only that the products are expensive and not widely available. Not only do I have to pay an arm and a leg for the products I have to drive all the way on the opposite side of town. As far as the custard it smell soooooo good like candy and cake. I experimented once and used the shampoo and the conditioner, but instead of using the curling custard I used this:
So instead of paying $16 on a 8oz jar of curling custard you can get 32oz of this for under $5. Another good thing about Kinky Curly is that they are cruelty free and organic. So of course organic products and foods are more expensive. There is so much irony in the fact that you have to pay more for organic(products without chemicals) as compared to products that are not organic(products that have chemicals and pesticides). I may no buy anymore of the curling custard but I love the conditioner. I can do without the shampoo but I will most likely buy it again.

I think it's best to end this post here. I have soo much more to say but I need to save some for later post (like a haul from the NYX Anniversary sale last month)! As always peace love and blessings~

Makeup MANIA+HAUL

When I'm into something I am really into it. I get obsessive over it and cant stop. Then one day it just ends. This is not that time. I am going crazy over makeup now. I don't wear it often so I have a lot to learn. Even though I'm still learning I want to have a LOT of options. So here is all of the makeup I recently purchased.

First up is my Manly 120 palette I purchased from eBay


It also came with a free eyeshadow brush which I almost threw away because I forgot about it. That is also why it is not pictured because it was in the trash at that time.lol I thought it would be cheap feeling but its actually good quality and very soft.

Next are my Urban Decay products. Got each on sale for $2 @HauteLook

Powder Brush, Big Fatty Colored Mascara(Indigo, Flipside, Electric Blue, and Black Cherry)

The next pics are all my NYX stuff I just got this week.

Ultra Pearl Mania(Fanta, True Purple, Jade, Yellow, Very Pink, Orange Zest, Turquoise, and not shown is Space since it hasn't arrived yet)


Jumbo Eye Pencil(Pure Gold, Electric Blue, Milk, Rocky Mountain Green, Purple Velvet)


Slim Eye Pencil(Electric Blue, Purple, Yellow, Baby Pink, Acid Green)

I may do some swatches on my next post. I have a lot of looks I want to try out this weekend so I will definitly be experimenting with everything I've got. I also want to buy some new containers to put the loose pearl shadows in. I think I may chill out on the shadow buying but I am looking for a new eye shadow primer. I basically use mary kay's primer in conjunction with my maybelline cool effect liner. The Mary Kay primer alone doesn't work well for me. Mine is from a few years back so maybe their format has change. I know the packaging has so I'll definitely look into that. Anyway that is it for now. Peach, Love & Many Blessings!

Happy New YEAR! ++Another Haul

Happy New Year!
Hasn't been a month yet and I'm making another post. Lets hope i can keep this up.
I haven't made a resolution. I just want to be the best me that I can be, and just grow and mature as much as possible.

Anyway to the hair! So since I've been natural I have rocked my fro probably 98% of the time. Maybe twice I rocked the curly look by way of kinky curly products. Which I love but when I use those products its so time consuming for me. I know it will probably get better over time. Anyway my friend told me about twisting my hair with some jam. So on Christmas Eve I stayed up all night twisting my hair. I originally planned to rock those for a few days. I didn't make them neat enough to do that. So i ended up taking them out the next day which was Christmas. I got soo many compliments. It was crazy. It made my hair so curly and cute. I rocked that style up until yesterday. Which leads me to my staples at the moment:

I use the Curl-Perfecting Spray to refresh my twist. I use the Frizz-Ease Kinky Curly Spiral Spritz mostly to lay my edges down. It's really light compared to gels. I usually put the Herbal Essence None Of Your Frizzness as my leave in.
In a few weeks I will be heading to California so I plan on getting either braids or kinky twist put in to give my hair a break from manipulation.

I have another haul from BBW. It probably seems like that is my favorite store but it is just a phase. When I love something I go crazy for it or even overboard then it eventually dies off. Anyway to the pictures:


I also picked up some earring from Papaya. They sort of remind me of some Betsey Johnson ones I've seen before.


So that's it so far. Hopefully I can keep this up. Peace, Love, & Many Blessings!

The Wait Is OVER! ++HAUL TIME

Long time no blog. I've had soooo much going on the last year. I though I posted more then I did. Anyway!!! To the good stuff!

I did my BIG CHOP on July 18th. I had to look at a calender thought I did it in August for some reason. Doesn't feel like it's been 5 months. My hair is growing fast. most likely because I really dont do a lot with it. I wash it every morning. Well technically co-wash it and once in a while I'll use shampoo if needed. Then I put in a leave in, a moisturizer, and sometimes oil and go. Since winter is here I really want to stop doing the wash and go. Still it's so easy. On top of that it is cold one day here and hot the next so that is not helping. I'm heading to Cali next month for my b-day so I'll get either twist or braids done.

Speaking of Cali!!! I will actually be moving there next summer. Hopefully!! I had a family emergency which required me to drain my savings. Don't mind doing that for my family, but I do hope I can move by next summer. I'm ready to go now. The economy is so bad there though that it does scare me. If it's God's will I'm sure I'll be there either way.

Anyway enough about that stuff it's HAUL TIME!

I've fallen in LOVE with Bath & Body Works again. I used to love them years ago, but fell off the wagon the last few years. Now I'm back on track and cant seem to stop buying there stuff. Next week they are having a sale on there classics. I have to stock up on my White Tea & Ginger.
Now to sum up my last few B&BW Trips:

Sensual Amber: Travel Size Fragrance Mist
Warm Vanilla Sugar: Fragrance Mist, Body Cream
Moonlight Path: Body Cream
Victoria's Secret PINK: Body Lotion & Travel Size Body Mist (Sweet & Flirty, Soft & Dreamy)
Secret Wonderland: Shower Gel, Body Lotion, Body Cream
Midnight Pomegranate: Shower Gel, Body Lotion, Body Cream
Butterfly Flower: Shower Gel, Body Lotion

Next is just a small Drugstore Haul.
I went to get a foundation and a facial brush cleaner but couldn't find a brush.

Garnier Nutritioniste: Skin Renew The Brusher
Milani: Even-Tone Powder Foundation
Nivea: A Kiss Of Milk & Honey

This will be my first time using foundation. I hope when I do full coverage the color works for me. I tested it out on a scar I have and it looked decent. I only purchase the Garnier because it was on sale and had a brush, so hopefully that works out too. Being that it is Christmas time I will definitely be coming back with more Haul pictures. I ordered a 120 palette last week. Yesterday I ordered 3 NYX lipglosses, and today I ordered 4 Urban Decay mascaras and a powder brush. So until next time Peace, Love, & Blessings

Ok I'm not dead!

Quite a while since I've posted anything on here. I've been so busy with work. When I'm not at work I'm most likely sleeping. Anyway lets get to why I'm really here.

As I said in my last post I wasn't sure when I would go back to my hairdresser. I think I went back after like 6 weeks. Haven't been back since. My hair still didn't get STRAIGHT when I went back for my relaxer so I'm now thinking about going back to transitioning again. I plan on getting my hair braided tomorrow. Hopefully the rest of the year my hair will be either twisted or braided. If things go well by the end of the year I'll just go right ahead and chop the relaxed hair off.

Even though I have yet to find a regimen for relaxed hair that I felt comfortable with I did manage to wash my hair once a week. I also deep conditioned once a week as well. I am still a PJ so I've purchased quite a bit since I last posted I'll have to update the purchases I made next time. I guess with keeping my hair braided up I most likely won't need those products until I start rocking my hair out again.

Anyway that is it for now. Peace, Love & Blessings~